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Tennessee

September 6, 2013

“Dwonna Know What I Think?”

Dr. Dwonna Goldstone

Dwonna Know What I Think?”

A social/lifestyle advice and commentary column by guest contributor Dr. Dwonna Naomi Goldstone. Dr. Goldstone is a Professor of English and Coordinator of the African American Studies Minor at Austin Peay State University in Clarksville, Tennessee.

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Dear “Dwonna Know What I Think? 

I just met a woman who is going through a divorce. She’s really nice, and we get along really well. What do you think? 

Signed,

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

__________________

Dear “Should I Stay or Should I Go”:

RUN! Run as quickly as your legs will carry you. A woman—or a man—who is going through a divorce is STILL MARRIED, and that person is probably not emotionally ready to be in another long-term relationship (even if that person tells you that they are).

Listen, you do NOT want to be that woman’s ‘rebound,’ and you do not want to be her transition from “separated” to “now I want to be single, so go away.” I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard this story—she says she wants to be in a relationship even though she’s separated, and shortly after her divorce is final, she then realizes that she just wants to be alone after having been married (even if it’s just for a few years).

Your potential girlfriend needs to spend a year not dating and figuring out what it is she really enjoys and who she is.  Tell her that you’ll call her in a year, and if it’s meant to be, you’ll find your way back together.

__________

 

*Dr. Goldstone lives in Nashville with her four unruly dogs—Satchel Paige, Butterfly McQueen, Charlie Parker, and Lena Horne. She can be reached at d.goldstone@businessclarksville.com.



About the Author

Dwonna Goldstone





 
 

 
 

“Dwonna Know What I Think?”

It’s an enormous step, coming out as the person you’ve always been. Part of coming out is explaining that very fact to the people who love and care about you. You are still the person they’ve always known and loved.
by Dwonna Goldstone
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Dr. Dwonna Goldstone

“Dwonna Know What I Think?”

"...Whitlock writes, “Mass incarceration has turned segments of Black America so upside down that a tatted-up, N-word-tossing white goon is more respected and accepted than a soft-spoken, highly intelligent black Stanford gra...
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Dr. Dwonna Goldstone

“Dwonna Know What I Think?”

He was very nice and actually looked like his picture, and we had a wonderful dinner with lots of conversation. But, I don’t think that I’m ready to date.
by Dwonna Goldstone
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